So it's been weeks since I posted, and now I come here to rant . . .
I would just like to say that I don't need all the world's negative birth comments and vibes - they can just keep them to themselves.
I like being pregnant. Sure I'm rather large these days, and one could accurately call my forward locomotion "waddling," but (and I'll say it again) I like being pregnant.
I don't feel any urgency to have this baby. Really.
Over the past few weeks I've been getting "sympathetic" comments from perfect strangers, neighbors, and others about:
- how big my belly is (Yup, that's what happens. Pregnant women's bellies get big. We have actual humans growing right inside there, you know.)
- how I'm carrying my baby (all out front from what I hear mostly -Where the heck do they think I'd put a baby - in my thighs? or maybe my buttocks? Nope, a baby grows in a uterus (Owen can tell you that!), and they tend to stick on on the front. In fact, I've never seen one that didn't.)
- how I must surely not be going to make it all the way to November (Really? And, pray tell, how do they figure by looking at me or talking to me on the phone when I might or might not have a baby? Let me tell you there are 1001 folk and other ways to "know." There's the you're-so-big-you-can't-possibly-go-that-much-longer "argument" as well as the I-just-wish-your-baby-would-come-on-out vibe. There is also the mine-all-came-at-X-time-and-you're-like-me-because-of-Y-so-your-baby-will-come-at-X-time-too reasoning. And my personal favorite: the line of thought that my(or my husband's, wife's, daughter's, aunt's, cousin's, person-I-once-knew's)-birthday-is-on-such-and-such-a-day-so-it'd-be-really-cool-if-your-baby-was-born-then-instead-of-when-s/he-is-ready-to-be-born. Yeh, you just gotta love that one - nothing even quasi scientific about it.)
- how I must be going to have a really large baby (Again, how can one tell this from looking at me or talking to me over the phone? Not sure, but again. I hear I am getting quite large. (The midwives don't think so, and I don't think I'm looking inordinately large either.) I have also been told I will likely deliver a 10 lb. baby since I haven't drunk the kool-aide, so to speak, and been deemed free of GD by the powers that be. Also cited is my previously "large" baby who was born at 41weeks,4days gestation weighing 8lbs1oz - actually a little under the expected weight for a male of that gestation.)
- how they wish my baby will come "early" or that I "only have another month" (I get that lots of people are not happy pregnant. That's okay. I am happy pregnant (despite this little diatribe). I get that people (including me - especially me) are excited to meet this baby. That doesn't mean my baby needs to come "early". Early, is by definition, not on time. There is no benefit to coming early and plenty of risk to it when you are talking about babies and not appointments. I have another 2 months for this baby to grow, and I would like to be *allowed* that full time for its growing enjoyment.)
- the sex of my baby (Again, how they "know" is an absolute riot - I'm all out front, you know. I am carrying my baby high/low/out front. Mostly I have avoided people feeling the need for me to have a particular sex for their own insecure reasons; that's nice.)
So, if you have any negative pregnancy or birth vibes, be sure to keep them to yourself the next time you encounter a hormonal pregnant woman. Instead, smile, ask how she is feeling, tell her something NICE about your pregnancies, ask her when the baby is due (but don't press for an actual date because that is just stupid and she might call you on it), talk about the weather. She'll thank you for it.
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Belly Pics
At my request, Abram took some pictures of my big ol' self the other evening on a walk around the park.
Here I am:
Thanks to Abram for taking the pictures for me.
Here I am:
Thanks to Abram for taking the pictures for me.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Wordsmith Wednesday: The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding, 8th Edition
It's been a while since I've done a Wednesday book review. I've been reading some - just not so much blogging lately. I recently read the newest edition of The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding which came out in July.
Before I had even finished the book, I took it to a book discussion and recommended it. Here is what I wrote to a friend and LLL leader after I was done:
"The last edition was a very useful and comprehensive manual, and I was glad to read it before I had Owen, refer to it afterward, recommend it, and lend it to other mothers. However, it just didn't spark much in me. I appreciated the authors' conversational tone and style in the new edition and appreciated how frank yet politic they were about the impacts of birth practices on breastfeeding. While the 7th Edition had about 9 pages of information to help mothers have a good birth (see pages 18-26, 7th Ed.), I was absolutely blow away by the sixty pages (see pages 1-61, 8th Ed.) dedicated to a good start through natural birth in the new edition. I am hopeful that the candid explanations of the negative impacts that unnecessary interventions can play along with the wonderful descriptions of physiologic birth will help mothers to achieve "normal" births in a time when it is becoming increasingly difficult and rare. I value my birth experience and attribute our successful and easy start to nursing largely to it. So many women and babies don't enjoy long and pleasant nursing relationships because they never 'get off the ground' in the early days. "
As I noted, this (and the other editions I have read) is a comprehensive manual on the why's and mechanical how to's of breastfeeding and with lots of practical advice - a great reference for any new mother. One of the 12 concepts of the La Leche League philosophy is, "Alert and active participation by the mother in childbirth is a help in getting breastfeeding off to a good start. " The newest edition of The Womanly Art, goes a long way in bringing an understanding of the link between birth and breastfeeding to the main stream mother.
How many mothers are told that their babies may have artificially high birth weights because of IV fluids the mother received in labor, and how many babies who are otherwise doing fine with breastfeeding are unnecessarily required to have formula supplements for not gaining enough weight in a prescribed time period? If a baby is nursing well and having adequate output (of poops and pees), then weight gain above birth weight very early may not be the best indicator of how he is doing. If he started off with excess water weight which he lost (and may not have had his lowest weight recorded), then he may be gaining just fine even though it mathematically appears otherwise.
How many mothers know that epidurals not only impact their ability to move and participate in birthing their babies but also affect baby's "ability to find the breast, latch, and suck effectively after he is born. . . from a few days to a few weeks," decrease a woman's production of pain-relieving endorphins that aid her and her baby during and after birth, and may raise mothers' and babies' temperatures which may lead to unnecessary separations and medication if a baby is suspected of having an infection and required to stay in a nursery for observation?
How many mothers are told that it is wise to allow the cord to stop pulsing on its own before it is clamped and cut so that the baby has it's full blood supply and high iron stores that will last many months?
I think very few mothers know these things but hope that many more will come to know them since The Womanly Art is a well-read, easy to find manual from a trusted source. It makes me feel hopeful for the future of birth and breastfeeding in our society.
Before I had even finished the book, I took it to a book discussion and recommended it. Here is what I wrote to a friend and LLL leader after I was done:
"The last edition was a very useful and comprehensive manual, and I was glad to read it before I had Owen, refer to it afterward, recommend it, and lend it to other mothers. However, it just didn't spark much in me. I appreciated the authors' conversational tone and style in the new edition and appreciated how frank yet politic they were about the impacts of birth practices on breastfeeding. While the 7th Edition had about 9 pages of information to help mothers have a good birth (see pages 18-26, 7th Ed.), I was absolutely blow away by the sixty pages (see pages 1-61, 8th Ed.) dedicated to a good start through natural birth in the new edition. I am hopeful that the candid explanations of the negative impacts that unnecessary interventions can play along with the wonderful descriptions of physiologic birth will help mothers to achieve "normal" births in a time when it is becoming increasingly difficult and rare. I value my birth experience and attribute our successful and easy start to nursing largely to it. So many women and babies don't enjoy long and pleasant nursing relationships because they never 'get off the ground' in the early days. "
As I noted, this (and the other editions I have read) is a comprehensive manual on the why's and mechanical how to's of breastfeeding and with lots of practical advice - a great reference for any new mother. One of the 12 concepts of the La Leche League philosophy is, "Alert and active participation by the mother in childbirth is a help in getting breastfeeding off to a good start. " The newest edition of The Womanly Art, goes a long way in bringing an understanding of the link between birth and breastfeeding to the main stream mother.
How many mothers are told that their babies may have artificially high birth weights because of IV fluids the mother received in labor, and how many babies who are otherwise doing fine with breastfeeding are unnecessarily required to have formula supplements for not gaining enough weight in a prescribed time period? If a baby is nursing well and having adequate output (of poops and pees), then weight gain above birth weight very early may not be the best indicator of how he is doing. If he started off with excess water weight which he lost (and may not have had his lowest weight recorded), then he may be gaining just fine even though it mathematically appears otherwise.
How many mothers know that epidurals not only impact their ability to move and participate in birthing their babies but also affect baby's "ability to find the breast, latch, and suck effectively after he is born. . . from a few days to a few weeks," decrease a woman's production of pain-relieving endorphins that aid her and her baby during and after birth, and may raise mothers' and babies' temperatures which may lead to unnecessary separations and medication if a baby is suspected of having an infection and required to stay in a nursery for observation?
How many mothers are told that it is wise to allow the cord to stop pulsing on its own before it is clamped and cut so that the baby has it's full blood supply and high iron stores that will last many months?
I think very few mothers know these things but hope that many more will come to know them since The Womanly Art is a well-read, easy to find manual from a trusted source. It makes me feel hopeful for the future of birth and breastfeeding in our society.
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